The Pink Cloud of Death and the Pretty Postcard
It’s a canon couple… yet it’s not a canon couple. Hard to explain yes, but if you know of Team Fortress 2 and Portal 2, along with the voice actors in such games… you’ll guess who the couple is.
Kudos to anyone who finds the Mystery Science Theater 3000 and The Ricky Gervais Show references.
The stroke of a soft cheek.
“I look old,” she mumbled, staring in the mirror in her bathroom and pushing her fingertips into her cheeks. She sighed sadly, bags under her eyes and stress lines along her jaw and cheeks… the combination of lack of sleep and pressure to perfect loaded on her shoulder caused all this and she wasn’t quite happy to see it. “I look ugly,” she huffed, trying to pull the skin of her face up to see if the imperfections would disappear… they didn’t. She frowned and slapped both hands against the counter to glare at her image in the mirror, completely disappointed and disgusted in herself. Some perfectionist she was…
“Now let me see.” She glanced up to see his reflection in the mirror, standing right behind her. “Come on, turn around,” he demanded gently, taking her shoulder to turn her to face him. He cupped her cheek and tilted his head to the side as if examining every inch of her face. After a moment, he smirked and shook his head slowly. “If you’re ugly and old, then I’m French and a moron.” He grinned to get a small smile from her and stroked her cheek slowly with his thumb. “Nah, you’re beautiful… anyone who says otherwise, let me deal with them.” She blushed and nodded, giggling when he gave her forehead a small kiss. “Now get going before your whack-job of a boss calls and yells at you.”
The sound of another’s heart beat.
The shrill beeping woke him quickly, making him gasp sharply and flinch from the pain in his body. After bearing through the aching, fiery pain inside him, his eyes fluttered open to see a starch-white room, darkened by the nighttime and only a single lamp being the only source of light. Every inch of his body ached, bandages wrapped tightly around his head, chest and arm and an IV taped firmly against his wrist. There must have been an accident at work… he couldn’t remember a thing from what happened, something must have really hit him over the head or something. Hopefully the others are all right…
Something shifted by his side and once he glanced over, the beeping of the heart monitor fluttered quickly in surprise. She jolted up from her chair and snapped her head around, frightened by the rapid beeping in fear that he was getting worse. He smiled and chuckled lightly at her, wincing from that yet relaxed once a hand rested on his cheek. “A-are you okay?” she whispered, hand trembling as she tried to hold in tears and be strong. She got a call from work, a bomb having destroyed the base he worked at and she rushed over as fast as she could, staying by his side this whole time. “Th-thank God you’re awake… I-I thought you were dead…” A tear escaped and she grumbled, wiping it away quickly in embarrassment. She hated crying, especially in front of-.
Her thoughts were interrupted when a stubble-covered face nuzzled into her hand. “Believe me… I am still alive,” he murmured with a warm smile.
The feeling of their hair in your hands.
She loved cats. She had pictures and motivational posters of them all over her office walls, would coo at them through the windows of pet stores and had three of her own at her home. One of them was too curious for her own good, looking in his backpack and taking his hat off his head to sleep in. Another one hated him terribly. The damn cat had a bad temper and when she discovered claw marks all over her boyfriend’s face and arms, she kept the two males as far apart from each other as possible. But she did love it when he gave her cat toys and accessories as little gifts, but drew the line when he showed her a thick, wool sweater with cartoon kitten sewn on the material with a cheeky grin on his face.
She even acted like a cat at times. When he’d come over to her house and sat on her couch to watch television, she’d immediately scoot onto his lap and curl herself against him with her head nestled in his shoulder. He chuckled and ran his fingers through her hair, watching her stretch out a bit and even purred softly at the touch. It made him smile as he continued, keeping an eye on her relaxed face and turned off the television when it started talking about some company called Black Mesa. Anytime that commercial came on, she’d get moody and when she gets moody, she gets worse than her cat with the anger issues.
The brush of fingers against their back.
“Can you reach this for me?” she asked, reaching for the zipper on the back of her dress and straining to grab it, even pushing down on her bent elbow to lengthen her arm, which only made it hurt.
“All right, keep still,” he muttered, slight annoyance in his voice. They were going to a small party held by her company to celebrate a new invention that was recently created, the acronym being ASPQTD. If the full title was discovered by anyone else, all the research and time they put into this could be ruined. The invitations requested formal wear, making her happy and him… not happy. He wasn’t the biggest fan of wearing suits, finding them to be too restricting and suffocating, but he promised to be her escort and he never broke promises.
“Move your hair out of the way,” he requested, watching her reach behind to gather her hair and push it over one shoulder, holding it in place. He kept a hand on her side and took the zipper between finger and thumb, pulling it up slowly while gliding his other fingers along her back to guide him. She shivered and blushed lightly once he finished, feeling two hands rest on her shoulder and lips press against the side of her neck. She smiled and leaned against him, closing her eyes and cupping his cheek gently
“We’re still going to the party,” she whispered, grabbing his hand to prevent it from pushing the sleeves down her arms and make them VERY late.
The telling of secrets and stories.
“… and before he knew it, he realized it was only blue paint!” she exclaimed with a fit of giggles as he threw back his head and laughed, a hand over his eyes and almost falling back in his chair. He got his paycheck and decided to take her out to eat, instead of staying at her place to order takeout or go to his place and heat up whatever he had in his fridge. Usually it was what he hunted that week or meals he took from his company’s fridge. When she found out they ate squirrel the last time, she refused to eat at his place again. So he found a very nice restaurant, forced himself to wear a suit and felt his chest swell with pride when seeing the look on her face as she gazed at the place.
“Anyways… he ended up in the hospital with both legs broken and we got sued.” He immediately stopped laughing and stared with wide eyes. “Oh its fine, it was just a couple thousand dollars.” She leaned over and took his hand. “This is a really nice place, thank you so much for taking me here.”
“No worries,” he replied with a grin, making her giggle. “Hey, did I ever tell you about my dad and how he scared the dog so badly, he ended up getting a heart attack?” How he said it was so shocking but so amusing, she slapped a hand to her mouth with wide eyes but giggled madly. “The poor thing got panic attacks and now he’s scared of everything.”
“A-and his name is… i-it’s so ironic, I-I…” She never finished the sentence, giggling until her face was red and ended up getting the hiccups.
The apology of a hidden lie.
“You and your boss?” he asked as she nodded with her head down. He just stared at her, face unreadable and fists clenched. “You said you two weren’t…” He couldn’t even finish the sentence, biting his lip hard and trying not to shout out of pure anger.
“It was only a couple times,” she whimpered, tears welled up in her eyes as she took a step towards him. “I-it didn’t mean anything, it was just… one of those kinds of relationships and it was months before I met you. We stopped on employment terms a-and we haven’t done anything since!”
“I don’t care if it was years ago, you should have told me,” he muttered with a dark look in his eyes. “I saw how he flirts with you, making you giggle and blush like that, and now I see you two… you two used to…” He looked away again, feeling sick with a mixture of anger and guilt for making her cry. “… I think I’ll stay in my van for tonight. I’ll… talk to you in the morning.” As he left, both of them knew neither of them were getting any sleep that night thanks to this argument.
The next day, she bought him flowers and he bought her a plush kitten. The apologies were accepted on both sides and peace was brought upon the land.
The pair of lips pressed against a scar.
“They don’t hurt anymore,” he said quietly, hoping it would help. He lived on his own for years in the vicious wilderness and now was working a job that was killing him every day. Thanks to both of these, his skin was etched with pale marks and dents from all the dangers he faced. He sat up and kept still as she traced the tips of her fingers along the scars on his bare shoulders and back. She did her best to identify where each mark came from, heart aching to know he’s been injured almost every day of his life. One looked like a tiger tried to maul him, another looked like he was shot in the kidney, and all over his back were thin white lines, like someone stabbed him over and over again. “I’m fine luv,” he murmured, silenced when he felt her kiss the ones on his upper back and neck. He smiled sadly and caught her chin in his hand when she kissed the newest one on his cheek, tilting his head to kiss away the tears on her face. “Mm, you’re just a sweet sheila… thank you.”
The sight of watching them sleep.
The argument on whose job was tougher was never discussed, for when days were very brutal, they’d always end up collapsing on the couch, bed or even the floor and pass out. She was very calm and peaceful when she slept, curling into a tight ball and swaddling herself in the blankets she almost always hogged from him. She didn’t take up much room but always kept herself snuggled close to him when they shared the bed… or couch… or floor.
He snored and drooled as he slept, twitching like a sleeping dog when dreaming and not minding at all when she took the blankets, unless it was getting cold outside, then he’d have to groggily fight for it until he forced her to share. Unlike her, he’d sprawl out and took up most of the bed, something that never bothered her since he always had his arms wrapped around her and face nuzzled in her shoulder or hair.
She opened her eyes with a soft groan, facing him just as his eyes started to flutter awake. He stared at her groggily and rubbed his eyes, grunting and blinking slowly until he could finally focus on her. “Did I ever tell you about Schrodinger’s theories?” she asked with a soft, tired voice, earning a small smirk as he laughed. “It’s amazing…”
The softness of their voice.
Blackbird was a beautiful song, perfect for her to sing. He had to write the lyrics and notes down for her when he first heard it, showing it to her and grinning at the reaction on her face. She did have backgrounds in singing, opera and such, and he loved it when hearing her sing in the shower or hum while she made coffee. “Give it a try,” he insisted as she glanced through it, nodding with a smile as she agreed to his request. “All right, sit down and I’ll be right back.”
The last time someone made fun of his talent of playing the banjo, he broke the jaw of that Boston chatter box that is not allowed to have caffeine. It wasn’t a stupid instrument, it was just one of the few instruments that are misunderstood… like bagpipes. He turned it, sitting on her white leather couch and scooted towards her to read the notes as he began to play. It was wonderful to be this close to her, having the words flow gracefully like silk in the wind, swimming in his ear as her breath brushed along his cheek warmly. Her voice was so perfectly soft and sweet, reaching into the body and squeezing the heart until it ached from the sweet sound of grace and beauty. A smile spread across his face, keeping in time and tune with her while plucking at the strings in a soft, slow rhythm. The last notes hovered in the air and she turned, face pink with a happy blush as he leaned in to steal a kiss.
The warmth of being held close.
Every single time she invited him to see a movie with her at home, he’d always find something wrong with it. “Look, she can’t dance at all!” he muttered, waving a hand at the television as she gave him a small glare. “He hypnotizes her, supposed to be a professional, and this is what he calls expert dancing? All she’s doing is twisting around, this is supposed to be a horror movie!?! I’ve seen Baptists who can dance better than this!”
“Well, you think you can do better at it, if you’re such an expert!?!” she retorted sharply, crossing her arms tightly over her chest. He stared at her and she ignored it up until he grabbed her arm and yanked her quickly to her feet, the music on the television still playing. He grasped her arm and waist, muttering to himself as he stepped awkwardly from side to side, trying to remember any knowledge of dancing. Really it was a clumsy mix of swing dancing and the side step, keeping his eyes down and making sure she followed him with each step. She was surprised at this and watched him and blushed when he ended the sloppily, sweet dance with a dip, keeping her tight in his arms and face stiff with anticipation on what her reaction was to his embarrassing moment. A grin appeared on her face and she nuzzled him. “You’re not a professional… but you’re better than that girl in the movie.” He smirked proudly and both collapsed onto the couch, continuing the movie. At the end, she agreed… the movie was horrible.
The sharing of an ice cream cone.
“What, where?” She tilted her cone and twisted to look.
“No, you’re making it worse!”
“Well, where is it!?!”
He grabbed her wrist to keep her still, making her jerk in slight annoyance and at the feeling of the cold treat dripping onto her hand. He dipped his head down and dragged his tongue along the edge of the cone, licking away the dribbling mess dripping and dribbling down and landing on her hand. She blushed and yelped when his tongue scraped against her hand, cleaning the mess but leaving behind a thin layer of saliva on her skin and ice cream cone. She gave him a glare, the emotions emitting from her eyes was a mix of, ‘ew, you are disgusting, don’t ever do that again’ and, ‘next time don’t do stuff like this in public, save it for when we’re at home.’ He chuckled and shrugged, licking his lips from the taste that remained on there. “Mm, what flavor is that?”
She huffed and took the handkerchief from his pocket to wipe her hand. “It’s chocolate with cherries in it…” She nibbled on her treat and gave him a glare. “You can have more when I’ve had my share.” He shrugged and nodded in agreement, waiting and watching patiently… right up to where she popped the last piece of the cone into her mouth. She smirked at the look on his face and shrugged. “I lied.”
The quilt around two cold bodies.
He invited her one weekend to take time away from work to go camping. She refused so many times, work being more important than sleeping in the woods with bugs, extreme physical labor and no toilets. That is, until her boss heard them talking and insisted she should go. She’d do anything he asked and hid her reluctance when she agreed to go.
Surprisingly, it wasn’t as horrid as she expected it to be. He kept by her side and helped her up the hills and over any fallen trees, even calming her after she jumped in his arms when a bird dive bombed at her head. He promised not to hunt anything unless they needed to, packing food with them and made camp when she started to tremble from exhaustion, not an athletic person like he was. She huddled by the fire and chewed on her cooked fish as he rolled out the sleeping bags, sitting up in alarm to see no tent being constructed as well. “We’re sleeping under the stars tonight, luv,” he responded with a grin when seeing the horrified look on her face. “Trust me, you’re going to like it.”
It was cold that night and she nestled into his chest, arms holding her tightly as he slept peacefully. She glanced up at the sky, surprised to see so many stars and how huge the moon was as they lit the earth with a ghostly, peaceful glow. She closed her eyes and cuddled closer, earning a grunt and drowsy nuzzles against her forehead in case she needed help and comfort to fall asleep. She didn’t need either, she was already content and at peace. It was the best sleep she’s had in years.
The caring of their aching cough.
“I don’t want to go to bed, I have to go to work so please put me down,” she whined, limp in his arms as he carried her from the van into her home. Her boss called him, saying how her face was red with a fever and she just stared at the wall while her hands filled out paperwork in messy, scribbled words. Though impressed that she had the guts to come to work with the flu, he didn’t want it to spread to everyone else, even the computers. She tried to push her lover away but he still kept her in his arms. “I’m fine, I have to go to work. I must improve the new inventions. Science never takes a sick day.”
“Science can live one day without you,” he argued softly, sitting her on the bed and taking her shoes off. She couldn’t physically protest, only sitting there and staring with feverish eyes and kept demanding him to bring her back to work. “You can’t even walk on your own, you’re not going back.” He sat her up to undo her dress and tucked her into bed, smirking as she continued to mutter about work. “They’ll live without you for a couple of days… they’ll get someone else to work on your work.”
“No,” she whined and curled up into bed as if cringing at the thought. “They’re all morons, their only function is to be morons.” He chuckled at the over exaggerated statement and gave her hot forehead a kiss. “I want to go back to work…”
“No you’re not, I’m not even going back to work until you’re better… oh, don’t give me that look, they can live without me for a while, trust me. How about I get you some tea?” She kept silent but nodded slowly, watching him stand and leave the room. She kept the blankets over her mouth to cover the smile she had on her face… what a polite and efficient man he was. “AGH, GET OFF ME, YOU BLOODY MONGREL!!!” Oh dear, he angered the cat again…
The confession of one’s feelings.
It was the worst day ever. He was sore and hurting, his company lost the battle they have with their rival company and those bastards made sure they’d remember they were the winners… in a painful, mocking way. Worst of all, he promised to come over to her place that day and the only thing he wanted to do was go to his place, sleep and forget that this day ever happened. In about an hour, she opened the door to see him there, battered and tired while holding a handful of wildflowers up to her.
She helped him inside, took his clothes from him to wash while he was cleaning himself in the bathroom and started brewing some tea for him. She urged him to lay down in her bed instead of his offer to stay on the couch and once he collapsed onto the mattress, she sat by him, made him roll onto his stomach and did her best to rub ant stress out of his back. No she wasn’t an expert, but she knew enough to make him relax and purr like a content cat. His leg even twitched while this happened, making her smile and silently giggle. He seemed to have dozed off but as she stood to tuck him in, two arms wrapped around her waist tightly and a face nuzzled into the small of her back. “I love you,” he mumbled softly, making her heart skip a beat. He’s said those words playfully before, like when she gives him coffee when he’s tired or invite him to stay the night if it was cold outside. But this time, the words were heavy with emotion and came right from his heart. He meant every word and had to move so she could sit down from the shock of it all. He sat up, now feeling ill with nervousness from receiving only silence and a pallid. She looked at him, whimpered and held onto him tightly, holding his face and kissing him all over. He grinned and managed to cup her face and kiss her softly, happy she felt the same.
The shakiness as they kneel.
“Are you sure…?” She shrugged weakly as he stared in shock, looking very nervous and had her eyes cast to the ground.
“I’m late,” she muttered softly, too ashamed to look at his face. They should have been more careful, this can’t be happening now! What about her work, what about his job? They’ll be slowed down, she’ll have to miss so many days and disappoint her boss, find someone to watch the-. She blinked as he walked over and knelt down, legs shaking as he wrapped her arms around her waist and pulled her to him. She was stiff and frozen, unsure what he was doing and it scared her terribly.
“Hey there,” he murmured, face against her stomach and eyes closed. “Can you hear me in there?” He smiled as she let out a small noise of disbelief. “This is your dad speaking… heh, you’re going to be in there for a while, but you better be nice to your mother. I can’t wait to see you… you’ll be a strong little mate, like your mummy. Mummy’s little killer, that’s what you are going to be.” He cooed and nuzzled her stomach softly. “I haven’t met you yet… but I love you, very much, and I promise to take good care of you and your mummy, okay?” He gave her stomach a soft kiss and looked up to see her face red and hands against her mouth to hold back any whimpers as tears streamed down her cheeks.
Several days later, they found out she wasn’t pregnant. But the thought of having a baby was still on their minds… at work, he started knitting a small blanket, finishing it even after he heard the news. As for her, she wrote down several names she liked as she took a break from her job. She thought of the perfect name… it meant little lamb in one language, sea shell in another… a shortened version of Rachael. Yes… it was perfect.
The box with the ring inside.
“Sir, I have the AGH!!!” She yelped when something whizzed past her head and slammed into the wall by her door, eyes widening and face pale to see it was an arrow. Confused, she walked to it and examined to see a letter wrapped around it and hanging from a string tied to the shaft was a small box. Confused, she unrolled the letter and read it carefully as she took the box and snapped the string to free it.
Her heart stopped and she dropped the letter, feeling nauseated but in a strangely good way. Quickly, she ran to the window while still clutching the box. He was down there, holding the bow in one hand and waving weakly with the other. She was shaking with tears in her eyes as she ran out the door, pushing her boss to the side to make it down the stairs, through the lobby and out the door where he welcomed her with open arms. She leapt into them and held him tightly, kissing him hard on the mouth as he steadied himself to not fall over. She had to breathe and forced herself to break the kiss, watching him take the box from her hand, open it and tenderly slipped the ring onto her finger. She lost it, letting out tearful laughs and kissing him one more, not letting go as he lifted her off the ground and swung her around, heart thudding so hard with pure joy, it felt like it was going to burst out of his chest.
“Jerry!” her boss explained, both he and the employee staring out the window at the tender scene. “Make sure the plaque on her door is changed to ‘Mrs. Caroline Mundy’ when she gets back! I want this wedding to be THE best one!!! We’ll have fireworks and birds and confetti!!! LOTS and LOTS of confetti! That makes EVERYTHING festive! That guy, I always liked that sniper! He’s got a good shot in him, real professional! I was hoping they’d get together, they’ll have children with good aim and fantastic singing voices! Don’t tell science about them though, we gotta keep this affair going! Huh? HA!!! Heh, am I right? You hear me Jerry!?!” The employee only nodded, taking mental notes to send these sorts of plans to the new British guy instead. He’s such a moron, easy to be tricked into doing things.
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